Deep Thoughts From the Inner Sea

Wrapping up...Time for a New Year

Lisa Dalton — Sat, 20 Dec 2008 23:35:00 GMT

As we move into the hustle and bustle of the holiday week, many of us are running around frantic to wrap up all the details of shopping and cooking for celebrations with family and friends. We are wrapping up deals and projects at work. We are wrapping presents for under the tree. We are busy wrapping up.

As I watch the snow fall outside and blanket the Earth, I am momentarily filled with a tranquil peace. The quiet beauty, as it glistens across the lawn, slows me down and I pause. In all this busyness there is something important to reflect on; we are wrapping up another year in our lives.

What did 2008 bring? Globally, we have seen much strife and discord over our planet and the lines we have drawn on Her that divide us. In America we saw our country divided on choosing a leader, but choose we did. Moving forward now with change and a new hope for the future. In our communities we have seen the effects of the financial crisis, with loss of jobs and security. And individually each and every one of us has a story of what 2008 brought to us. There was good and bad, challenge and opportunity, benefits and costs. What did the year bring for you? What do you take away from it that brings you joy? What are you ready to let go of and leave behind? And what will the new year bring?

The dawn of a new year. 525,600 minutes to use as we choose. When we begin the year we all have a very hefty bank account of time to use as we like. We are all beginning the year rich in opportunity with more than half a million minutes to spend living our lives. We get to choose to make big changes, little adjustments, important plans and meaningful contributions.

How will you spend yours? That is your choice. Each minute you spend is an investment you make in your life. The return on that investment is largely up to you. “I'll try to make the time.” “If I can find the time.” This time, next time, some time...all phrases we use about our time. And the truth is, we can't make time or find time, we use time. Each one of those minutes is time that you use. You can spend them pursuing your passion or learning something new. You can spend them taking care of yourself and those around you. You can spend them thinking about what you would like to do or use them to actually do it! You can spend them watching TV.

It is your choice how you spend down your account, and it is constantly diminishing. Every minute of every day.

The beauty of this account is that, unlike money, we all get the same amount. Not one of us has more or less than the others. Sure, some of our time does not feel like our own and is 'taken up' by the demands and responsibilities of jobs, family issues and unexpected events. We all have areas of our lives that use our time... family, work, sleep, health, community, recreation...but we all get the same amount in a day. All the more reason to use the minutes that you have the most control over to do what matters most to you. Awareness is the first step. Being aware of how you choose to spend your time will help you make powerful choices when you have time available to you. Each stretch of time that you embrace doing what you love leads to creating the life you want in the life you already have.

The snow has stopped and weak sunshine pours from a milky gray-blue sky. A family of Mallards stroll across my neighbors yard; he stands there watching them. It is a beautiful day in its frigid stillness. I am grateful that I looked up from my busy schedule to notice. The list of the many things I need to do today creeps up on me and I shoo it away, gently. The shopping, cleaning, cooking—and wrapping—can wait.

This time, I choose to write.

Breathtaking...

Lisa Dalton — Fri, 19 Dec 2008 18:59:00 GMT

Sitting down at my desk I try, once again, to write.

Being fully aware that there is no try—only doing or not doing—I realize what I really mean is to write something good. Every foray into the creative zone for me lately has been a dismal, disappointing spewing of crap not worthy of rereading myself let alone sharing with others. Yet here I sit, once again, trying.

I lean back and let my eyes wander around my office. Photos of beautiful places and inspirational phrases neither transport nor inspire me, save for one that states: “Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.” Ah. Breathtaking moments. Let’s see...that weekend in Door County was breathtaking. Steve and I so shiny and new, wandering through eclectic art shops, holding hands, falling in love. He bought me that plaque then; a souvenir of our magical weekend together. I was memorized by our comfortable banter, the electricity between us, his blue eyes studying me so intently, so sincerely. He truly took my breath away.

That feels so long ago.

Slumping back, sliding deeper into my chair—and my gloom—I search my memory for recent moments that have left me breathless. Picture perfect Kodak moments don’t spring to mind but instead I recall my sharp intake of breath at the audacity of something one of my sons has said to me, leaving me feeling disrespected and forlorn. The shallow, wincing breaths I take while walking gently on my fractured foot. A quick inhale as I abruptly stop myself from saying something to Steve that I just know he really doesn’t want to hear. Followed by a deep sigh.

Oh! And the gasp that comes after hearing almost anything that comes out of Sarah Palin’s mouth.
My life has offered me few truly breathtaking moments lately. The good ones, I mean. A spectacular sunset, cradling a newborn baby, the perfect kiss. The ones you want to measure your life by. And yet, if I go back far enough, I have been blessed with some real breath takers: giving birth to a child, diving to the bottom of the ocean, saving a life, romantic adventure, my words being published, hanging with rock stars and basking in dramatic sunrises and sunsets across the globe. Finds of all magnitude have made me catch my breath from finding the right guy to finding a great house to finding a fantastic pair of shoes, in my size, on sale. More than enough moments to measure. My glass is not just half full—my cup runneth over.

And so what of the bad ones? A myriad of breathless moments we collect in our lifetime that stop us in our tracks. The choking moments of loss, pain or grief when we can’t breath at all. When life knocks the wind out of us. When we are hyperventilating in shock or anguish. That is when we need to take a very deep breath. In and out. Remembering that to breathe is to inspire.

I see the inspiration in my recent breathless moments, those that left me frustrated or even pissed off. They have moved me to detach when I need to, to look at myself and see where others may be frustrated with me, to educate myself, and talk about, the state of the world and the people who hope to move our country forward. Each moment has inspired me to do something. Even if it was to sit down and put my foot up.

I am sitting up taller in my chair now, pleased that I wrote something. It doesn’t feel like it’s very good, but it isn’t total crap. I turn to look out the window and am startled by the crimson and burnished gold of the leaves that have turned so suddenly. I hadn’t noticed yet that Fall has arrived. Sunlight pours down casting long shadows on the ground as perfect clouds drift slowly across an azure sky. A breeze catches a flurry of loose, golden leaves and carries them gently down to the rooftop below. Oh, my. How pretty.

It’s breathtaking.

Reaching the shore...

Lisa Dalton — Tue, 01 Aug 2006 14:48:00 GMT

I pick up a weathered shell from the bowl that sits on the patio bar where I am working. I have collected hundreds of them from beaches all along each coast and they lay in bowls and dishes everywhere in my home, radiating the energy of the sea. This one is pitted and worn from it's journey through rough, turbulent waters to the shore where I picked it up. It's amber and purple hues faded, yet still glossy.

I am most drawn to these that have the markings of a difficult life, passing over the perfect ones that look like they could be purchased in a store. The unique imperfection of the one in my hand has a story that reveals the delicate inside where a life once lived. It has been tossed around on its journey through the sea and landed with it's insides exposed, the thick outer covering worn back enough to see a glimpse of what lies at the center. It is in the experience of weathering storms, traveling far, and having parts of you peeled away to reveal what's inside, that creates true beauty and strength. Surviving distress and emerging beautiful.

Its distressed magnificence holds wonder to me. Knowing that when faced with distress you allow the deeper parts of yourself to emerge and your courage to shine through. Pressure creating the cracking of some parts and wearing thin of others forges resilience. The truth is that we are all covered up in scars. The wounded places in us hold our greatest beauty like the worn, pitted brilliance of a shell washed up on the shore after its journey through the wild surf.

When faced with distress, look inside to see what is emerging that is beautiful and strong, and trust that your journey will land you safely on the sandy shore.

Lisa

Surfacing...

Lisa Dalton — Thu, 01 Jun 2006 20:39:00 GMT

Now that the new site has been launched, I have come up for air. I am thrilled with the wonderful response I have gotten from so many people about it! It's a great feeling to have created a place to convey what I do, what coaching is and to present the possibilities available to us when we are willing to go deep. I hope you visit often and post your comments and thoughts here.

I have been acutely aware lately of the ways in which we hold ourselves back and create limitations in our lives. There are so many ways that we do this and I am no exception! And yet, it is a choice. Instead of holding back we can choose to experience all of who we are. Self expression is at the root of being passionate beings, and without it, life can feel lifeless and dry. Think about all the ways in which you are holding back from expressing yourself. What if you chose to let go and risk feeling stupid, looking silly, being vulnerable or making a mistake? What's the worst thing that could happen? What if you took the plunge into the unknown and there were fantastic treasures just beneath the surface waiting for you? I am not suggesting you jump off a cliff without a chute, but rather allowing yourself the freedom to choose what you really want. Even if it is in some small way. Big ways are even better! What are you not allowing in your life that you really want and deserve? There must be something. When you uncover it, bring it to the surface and then do something about it. You will be amazed at how good you will feel.

Your life can be a ripe, juicy peach ready for the picking. Or it can be a dried out saltine cracker that sticks to the roof of your mouth. When you take a bite out of life...choose juicy.

Slurp,
Lisa

Taking the plunge...

Lisa Dalton — Mon, 10 Apr 2006 04:22:00 GMT

This is my first foray into the world of blogging! As I launch my new website, I wanted a place to share thoughts in a forum for the discussion of creating the life you want! As I work with others to be the architects of the life they want to build, I am also pursuing my own dreams and vision. This is a place for me to share my process of moving forward in my own life and what I learn along the way. Let's share resources, good reads, cool events, questions and triumphs! I invite clients to share successes and visitors to share ideas and ask questions about the coaching process.

Welcome to the new Inner Sea.

Dive in the water is fine...

Lisa